Rainbow Heron's Personal Views On The Stan Problem

I first started lurking in AMW-A in mid-July of 1998, about a week and a half before Stan made his first post here. Since his first post, I found him to be very arrogant, self-absorbed, selfish, and just about every other negative thing you can imagine! My *very first* post to AMW-A was the standard self-intro, but my second dealt with Stan.

For weeks, I held my breath and my tongue as I watched Stan flame amw-a almost into pieces. Then one day, I got *so* fed up that I posted, almost entirely in French, my disgust and personally lashed out at Stan. No one has any right to barge into a peacful forum the way he did!


The battle ensued between Stan and the rest of the ng; rarely did I post in regards to him. Then came the fateful weekend of September 20th. I was at my uncle's wedding that day, but on the ng the war reached a climax as Stan left. Of the nearly 200+ posts I had to search thru on Sept 21st, it was evident that the end of Stan was a long and painful ordeal. For a few weeks afterwards, we on amw-a breathed a well-deserved sigh of relief. We even poked fun at him, using his clichéd phrases to entice a laugh. Bermuda had a fun time with his share of it that's for sure! :) He could imitate Stan perfectly with both amused and scared folks! :) But considering how badly Stan had treated him, I think Jon deserved at least that much.

But Stan returned- sometime between late October and mid-November, IIRC. He went right back to his old tricks and we became miserable once again. And again, we rallied against him on the ng and discussed tactics via email with each other.


Then one day, (late December 98/early January 99)I got an idea. One of Stan's flame phrases is that we "are close-minded", thus unwilling to give him a shot at listening to what he has to say. Now, I am only *half* "closed-minded" and only about things I am dead certain about. But it occurred to me: what would happen if an amw-a reg "opened" their mind, listened to Stan, and attempted a compromise (via email of course, to spare the ng any unpleasantness and to keep focused)? So I tried it.

Stan was at his old tricks and made a direct insult to me, I responded, and then proceeded to begin a negotiation of sorts via email.

It all started off with a bunch of political sh*t and 'laying it all out': what is is Stan wants? what is it that the ng wants? is there a way to integrate Stan into amw-a if he is willing to leave his politics, syncs, and other stuff that the ng deamed 'not Al-related' out 100%. For about 5 hours a day for 5-6 days, Stan was actually civil and expressed a willingess to compromise. But after those 6 days, he began to slowly slip back into the obnoxious mode. I had to very firmly tell him to stay on topic. Sometimes it worked, and sometimes it didn't. But for nearly 2 weeks, I "opened [my] mind" and listened to what Stan's side of the issue, and I did my best to remain neutral in my tone and wording.

It finally came time to gather the same info from the individual ng regs that I'd gathered from Stan, when Stan shot himself in the foot. He posted to the ng that whatever they said, it would not affect him (that was a summary btw)- contradicting what he'd said to me earlier: that he was willing to compromise. *Now* who's being "close-minded"?!?! I began to get some individuals' side of the issue, when tragedy struck.

An emergency on my end, totally unrelated to Stan, the newsgroup, or even Al, happened and I had to cease all negotiation activity. Hoping to have someone help, give suggestions, or even 'take over' my spot until I was able to return, I posted to the ng Stan had previously terrorized. I explained the situation in terms they'd understand, and I asked them to email me. Instead, what I got was a bunch of flames, and amw-a got an unexpected invasion of flamers from that ng! That was *not* the way I had intended things to be. And since they refered to me and my plea for help in terms they'd understand- any chance I'd have of continuing negotion once the emergeny was over with, was shattered to kingdom come.


In terms of reaching a compromise, the negoitations were a failure. But in terms of gathering info, it was a good success. More insight was gained on how to deal with Stan in the future. Yes, it sounds scary to most people (that someone on their side would willingly go neutral to try an make amends), but I felt that *someone* had to try. And since no one else was willing to step up to the plate- I did. Yes, I got bruised and yes I did get hurt, but I gained some insight and experience. In the meantime, since the negotiations were so abruptly ended, the ng had to go back to square one.

Sometime in mid-spring, a second troll, Conrad Dobler, entered the ng in support of Stan. By then, as now, I was just so tired of the whole thing that I quit participation in the frontlines of the war. Instead, I took the backseat and watched as Conrad left and Stan was booted off AOL.

After being booted, we got a few 'Stan Clones' and we're still uncertain as to wether or not it really was Stan, because his tactics were used so often that *any*one could have easily imitated him! Stan then began posting from various emailers and got booted several times. He managed to get a hold of one for a period of about 3 months, but I just put him on 'ignore'. That was when both he and Anonymous, our newest troll, both disappeared until early January of 2000.


Now back on AOL, Stan has now taken to taking pot-shots at me (something he used to do anyway) and making references to specifics during the negotions. Due to the enormous amount of Newbies that are on amw-a now, who weren't on exactly 1 year ago as of this writing [1-19-00 am], I'm having to put this up publically to explain certain things. And if Stan flames me for it- quite frankly, I don't give a damn anymore! Flame away; it doesn't affect me at all. The *only* reason I'll respond is if said references are made and my responses are all made for the sole purpose of helping the Newbies in general and 'setting the record straight'.


Now if after reading this faithful [yet extremely brief and consice and there are certain aspects of the negotiations I am *not* willing to make public] narrative of what's happened, you feel like you need more information: *please* don't hesitate to email me.

Please don't bring it up in the ng!

I don't make trouble, I only try to help it go away.

Thank you for your time, and I hope I have been of some help.


Thanks for stopping by!

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